SMILING VS. FLATTERY [#16730]

When I smile at people and give compliments to people or greet them, I feel happier with myself. I am usually very self-absorbed, either in my thoughts or in my self in general, sometimes thinking about my own ruchniyus or sometimes thinking about Torah but other times I am simply absorbed in various thoughts and fantasies, and when I smile at others or compliment them I feel like I’m coming out of my self-absorption and entering into others. This helps me come out of my self-absorption in general, and especially from feelings of sadness or worry. I am aware that the Rav has spoken about how smiling and complimenting others can often be stemming from a desire to flatter others, which is false connection with others and not a true connection. So, practically speaking, is it generally a good thing or a bad thing when people smile at others, compliment others, and greet others?

When you smile/compliment/greet others, it should be with the awareness that you are trying to avoid flattering them. Practically speaking, try to minimize this act of smiling/compliment/greeting others, so that you can restrict this particular movement of the soul and balance it. Every “light” needs a “vessel” to contain it and hold it. In this case, the “awareness” is the “light”, and minimizing the actions of flattery is the “vessel” that will hold the “light”, your awareness to flattery.
However, you should certainly continue to smile at others, to be sensitive to others and also for your own self-improvement.