QUESTION:
I find that, unlike the weekday, it is on Shabbos when I get into bad moods and I am thinking thoughts that aren’t good, and I have explosions of babyish behavior and anger. This is very difficult both for me and my family. I have davened much about this and I have tried to deal with this situation. What can be the reason(s) for this and what can I do to fix this issue?
ANSWER:
Sometimes there can be external reasons for this. It is because a person is found with his family on Shabbos and he is not as involved in his orderly, organized inner world and Torah learning that he may have during the week. Sometimes it can also be because “Whoever is greater than his friend, his evil inclination is stronger.” This is true both about the soul and time. And sometimes it is because a person wants to grow higher and learn more Torah on Shabbos, and when that aspiration doesn’t happen, a person becomes sadder, whether consciously or subconsciously. It is worthwhile to organize a routine for Shabbos, and also to learn about what Shabos is so that you become more connected to Shabbos. For example, learn sefer Shabbos Malkesa or any sefer on the topic of Shabbos that you have an interest in. Also, view Shabbos as the time of raza d’echad, the time when we are given the ability to reveal the secret of oneness – to be “one” with the family, to show love, kindness and joy with them.
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