QUESTION:
What does it mean that a person needs to be someiach b’chelko (happy with his portion) even when it comes to his ruchniyus? If a person isn’t aspiring for great levels then why should he be happy with himself? Just like when it comes to money and other physical assets, person who has 100 will always want 200 and he isn’t happy with what he has, isn’t it the same with ruchniyus, that no matter how much a person has accomplished spiritually, he can’t be satisfied with himself because he always wants to go higher?
ANSWER:
Being someiach b’chelko is not merely something that one needs to be intellectually aware of. It is not a calculation or an equation to make. Rather, it is means to feel a connection to what you have so far reached. When you become connected to what you have reached so far, you become connected to your havayah (your very inner reality), according to your current level. And there, all other calculations fall away. Compare this to a child who is given a small present, who is the happiest person in the world with his little present. As long as a person doesn’t connect himself to what he has so far reached in his ruchniyus, he can only be aware of it intellectually, and it will be very hard for him to be happy with himself.
A person needs a lot of strong emunah to believe this is what Hashem wants from him, to reach whatever he has so far reached in his ruchniyus, and that this is his allotted portion when Hashem has given him, at least for now. And sometimes, even if you are merely intellectually aware of your spiritual accomplishments, you can also find happiness in these thoughts as well.
A person needs a lot of strong emunah to believe this is what Hashem wants from him, to reach whatever he has so far reached in his ruchniyus, and that this is his allotted portion when Hashem has given him, at least for now. And sometimes, even if you are merely intellectually aware of your spiritual accomplishments, you can also find happiness in these thoughts as well.
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