25 General Avodas Hashem Questions [#15734]

October 11, 2021

QUESTION:

1) What is the purpose of life – d’veykus in Hashem or to give Him a nachas ruach? If it’s the same thing then how it can be that this little detail of giving a nachas ruach to Hashem, which is the intention in every mitzvah, is really the purpose of life? Also, if I’m trying to give a nachas ruach to Hashem in everything I do then it feels like I’m serving myself, not Hashem, because I am doing it all so that I can be davuk in Hashem and become a perfected person. It’s not lishmah. What is the goal that we need to be striving for in our lives?

ANSWER:

Giving a nachas ruach to Hashem is not just another detail in serving Hashem. His entire nachas ruach from us is when we are davuk in Him and we are miskalel in Him. That is the main desire we need to have, and every other spiritual desire is just a branch of this root desire. Nachas ruach means, “Do My ratzon. And what is my ratzon? That you should be davuk in Me.” Now, if you are being davuk in Hashem not because you want the bliss that comes from this but because you want to be davuk in Hashem regardless of any bliss, then you are doing it lishmah, and the same thing is true if you are being davuk in Hashem in order to give Him a nachas ruach: it is lishmah.
QUESTION
2) If our true self is our neshamah then what is the meaning of the “The soul you placed in me?”
ANSWER
From the perspective of This World, man is the Ruach level of the soul. From the perspective of the Next World, a day that is entirely Shabbos, man is a Neshamah, because Shabbos is called the day of the neshamah. Now that we are in the end of days, after midday of Erev Shabbos as the Gra discusses, the light of Shabbos is shining (and it shines stronger when the time to daven Minchah arrives). Thus the light is shining strongly now that we are a Neshamah. One needs to absorb this perspective well . That is also why the Neshamah level of the Torah – the secrets of Torah – are more revealed in the end of days, as the Leshem writes. That is why our today is more on the level of Neshamah, for one to say “I am a pure Neshamah”, and this shines the light of Shabbos within one’s soul. One should let this perspective penetrate him and gradually it will be revealed and he will sense it.
QUESTION
3) How do we know if we are being calm and relaxed when we serve Hashem and giving Him a nachas ruach? Maybe we are just being lazy.
ANSWER
Laziness comes from the dominance of the heaviness of the body. Nachas Ruach comes from being connected to our yishuv hadaas, to settling our mind, when we can act quickly but with a calm mind.
QUESTION
4) How can we know if we’re really close to Hashem or if we’re just imagining it?
ANSWER
A person needs the ability to grasp reality. Just like a person can be realistic on this world, by not imagining things and being grounded in reality, so too in the inner world a person can be realistic, where he is further from imagination and closer to reality. One can gain this ability to being grounded and realistic when it comes to being on this world - but he should make sure not to become mixed with the world today.
QUESTION
5) How can a person work on loving Hashem? By nature I’m not that emotional…
ANSWER
Listen to the series Maarachos B’Ahavas Hashem.
QUESTION
6) How can a Kohen feel more ahavas Yisrael when he’s saying Birkas Kohanim?
ANSWER
Listen to the series “Getting To Love Your Fellow Jew.”
QUESTION
7) Let’s say I enjoy learning a certain perek of Gemara, but I’m learning it all for my own intellectual enjoyment and I want it to be more lishmah. How can I make my learning more lishmah and how can I also make all of my avodas Hashem in general more lishmah?
ANSWER
Increasing lishmah is a gradual process. You can do it by getting used to learn even when you don’t have cheishek (desire) or by reviewing Gemara when you don’t feel like it, or by trying think more deeply into the Gemara even when you don’t have the desire to concentrate that much right now.
QUESTION
8) What is the right way to get through Elul, Rosh HaShanah, Aseres Ymei Teshuvah, Yom Kippur in a way that we’re not just surviving it but really utilizing it? To be uplifted from it and enjoy a bliss in Hashem and enjoy these days and await for these days to come and do it all in the right away, but without pressure or tension?
ANSWER
Try to feel that Hashem is in front of you and speak to Him simply, like a person talking to his friend, as the Mesillas Yesharim says.
QUESTION
9) What is the meaning of doing complete teshuvah which is expected of me during Yomim Noraim? And when does a person do complete teshuvah – once or every day? Do we have do complete teshuvah by the time we reach Rosh HaShanah or do we have until Yom Kippur? From the tefillos that we daven during all of these days it seems that the teshuvah happens on its own from these very days.
ANSWER
Make a small kabalah (resolution) which makes your avodas Hashem more stable. During Yomim Noraim, you should be more intense about that kaballah. That is besides for doing cheshbon hanefesh and keeping away from doing aveiros.

QUESTION
10) If I feel that I do more teshuvah when I say viduy, in my own words and not using the Nusach, when should I do teshuvah?
ANSWER
Either you can do teshuvah for all the aveiros represented by each letter of viduy as you say each letter, or after you finish the nusach of viduy you can then add on anything that’s on your heart.
QUESTION
11) How do we come to true regret over all aveiros from the whole year? Right after doing an aveirah it’s easier to regret it, but after a long time a person don’t feel pained that he did the aveirah, and certainly it’s harder to feel pain and regret over so many aveiros at once which a person forgot about.
ANSWER
One has to think that whenever he is being prevented from growth in ruchniyus – whether he is being intellectually, emotionally or actively blocked from trying to make progress in his ruchniyus, all of this (at least to a large extent) is because of the effects of doing aveiros. So even if a person doesn’t feel pain that he did an aveirah, he can at least feel pained over the effects that the aveirah is having on him. Also, one can have pain over the very fact that he isn’t on the level of doing the will of Hashem.
QUESTION
12) What’s more important to Hashem on Rosh HaShanah and Yom Kippur – davening a long Shemoneh Esrei and asking Hashem for the future, or saying all the Piyutim?
ANSWER
You need to act according to your cheilek, and that’s the main thing!
QUESTION
13) How can we be so focused on the davening and on the words we are saying, and also be calm? How can we feel closer to Hashem through davening?
ANSWER
Think about what you have gained until now, and also think of what you’re missing. Throughout these days, keep going back and forth in your mind between focusing on what you have gained with what you still need.
QUESTION
14) How can a person make a true resolution for the future? I am anyhow trying to do the right thing every day, so what will tomorrow be any different than today…?
ANSWER
Refer to answer to question 9 above.
QUESTION
15) What is the avodah of Elul?
ANSWER
Ani L’Dodi v’Dodi Li – to feel that Hashem is Dodi (my Beloved).
QUESTION
16) How do we have more bittul to Hashem and how do we make Him into the Melech over us?
ANSWER
By making a small kaballah to do one thing every day that goes against your ratzon, and to do it because you want to do the ratzon Hashem over your ratzon.

QUESTION
17) How do I forgive someone with our full heart? Many times I want to forgive and I don’t want the other to get punished because of what he did to me, but in the end I still feel some resentment in my heart at him for what he did to me.
ANSWER
It is a long process of purifying your heart. It includes purifying yourself from being connected to This World, purifying yourself from any traces of evil in you, and to increase your ahavas Yisrael.
QUESTION
18) How do I prepare for Yomim Noraim in a way that I don’t feel pressure on me? Through mussar or chassidus?
ANSWER
Both. On one hand, you should want to reach your shleimus and tikkun, but you also need to feel a closeness with Hashem, that the King is in the field in Elul and He is closely within reach even to the simple folk. During learning, learn with a bit more of a deeper connection to the Torah.
QUESTION
19) How much time of the day should I spend on trying to become more internal, accessing my havayah/Yechidah, etc.?
ANSWER
Not more than a half hour a day. It depends on what aspect you are learning about, because sometimes it requires less time.

QUESTION
20) Why is it is important to get into our “havayah”? Also, in yeshiva, how I can live more with my “havayah” when the very atmosphere in yeshivah is loud, intense and active, and it’s so hard for me to have yishuv hadaas?
ANSWER
It is so important because “For this is the entire person.” You need to find a few minutes of quiet every day for this – and usually, it’s possible to find some time.
QUESTION
21) Just like a person needs to regain his serenity by pausing his actions every so often, does a person also need to do this while he’s learning Torah? Doesn’t learning Torah need to be consecutive and without pause? And if one does need to pause his learning every so often, one should he do during that break? Does he need to be still thinking or is it a time to clear his mind and be in a state of ayin? And does a person also need to pause his davening every so often?
ANSWER
Yes. A person needs serenity in order his thoughts to perform properly, and without pausing one’s thoughts every so often while learning, one will not be able to think calmly and clearly when he’s learning. This is not a time to slacken off from learning, it is rather a space that allows one’s thoughts to become serene, to empty them out, and become tranquil in the mind. It’s no different than the need to relieve oneself, which is not considered like interrupting one’s learning.
QUESTION
22) Is it better to do what Hashem wants or to do what’s more socially acceptable by my friends in yeshivah?
ANSWER
Don’t be noticeably different from them - only a bit.
QUESTION
23) How can a person know if what he’s doing is according to his shoresh neshamah?
ANSWER
The more a person acts lishmah, the more he will reach his personal portion, because through acting lishmah a person removes all the layers of him that are shelo lishmah.
QUESTION
24) How can I feel that Hashem loves me?
ANSWER
Think of everything that He gives you regularly. That is the first thing to start thinking about. Later take this thinking further by thinking that you are Hashem’s child, for “You are children to Hashem.”
QUESTION
25) How can I work on loving Hashem when I’m a young teenager?
ANSWER
The more you feel that Hashem loves you, the more your own love for Hashem will be awakened.