QUESTION:
1) The Rav has said that ever since corona began, our avodas Hashem is to find our individuality and be alone with Hashem when we are in seclusion. Currently I am dating and trying to get married, but I’m wondering: Why should I get married and join my life with another person, if my main avodah now is to find my “individuality” and be more alone with myself, which is the very opposite of the entire idea of marriage? Especially because I know that I won’t be able to do either avodah 100% if I try to somehow o both.
2) Also, how can I get married and have a successful relationship with another human being, which requires me to exit my private existence and be joined with another human being, if I am mainly supposed to be alone and finding my individuality now during these times?
3) Also, how can I get married now and be happy, when the entire world is going through something painful and difficult? It feels selfish of me to get married now during these times. Also, maybe I should push off marriage until the Redemption arrives, when I can then get married with true complete joy, and amidst total purity and holiness [as opposed to getting married now, when my joy cannot be complete because the rest of the world is suffering]?
2) Also, how can I get married and have a successful relationship with another human being, which requires me to exit my private existence and be joined with another human being, if I am mainly supposed to be alone and finding my individuality now during these times?
3) Also, how can I get married now and be happy, when the entire world is going through something painful and difficult? It feels selfish of me to get married now during these times. Also, maybe I should push off marriage until the Redemption arrives, when I can then get married with true complete joy, and amidst total purity and holiness [as opposed to getting married now, when my joy cannot be complete because the rest of the world is suffering]?
ANSWER:
1) The current avodah, of having time alone to yourself every day and finding your holy individuality, is not meant to take up your entire day. It is only meant to be for a small part of the day. You have times of the day where you are involved with people, and you can also have some time of the day when you are alone with yourself and getting in touch with your private self. We cannot be successful 100% at anything. The point is just to change your perspective, which can only happen at a gradual pace.
2) You can feel pain for what others are going through, but you cannot be that way all the time, because for most people, it is unhealthy to be in a state of pain all day over others’ suffering. The rule is: “Serve Hashem with joy”, in every situation.
3) Don’t wait [until the Geulah] to get married. Remove all your cheshbonos (calculations) and continue to live normally like the rest of the world.
2) You can feel pain for what others are going through, but you cannot be that way all the time, because for most people, it is unhealthy to be in a state of pain all day over others’ suffering. The rule is: “Serve Hashem with joy”, in every situation.
3) Don’t wait [until the Geulah] to get married. Remove all your cheshbonos (calculations) and continue to live normally like the rest of the world.
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